Wednesday, October 15, 2008

In-Flight Entertainment

I rarely talk on airplanes. I usually sit down, pull out a book or my headphones, and try to relax until I get from point A to point B. Not today.

It all started with my bag. You see, I acquired stuff at my dad's house, and decided to take a bag of it back up with me to DC -- a little blue gym bag that may or may not have been the bag I used for summer camp one year, back in the mid-1980s. Despite the fact that the bag was tiny, it would not fit in the overhead bin, thanks to some oversized suitcases and a whole bunch of tennis rackets. (Note to self: Next time you're in Florida, remember to look for your old tennis racket in the garage.)

So the guy next to me volunteered to let me put it in front of his seat. He then commented that he could judge how stressful someone's job was by the size of their coffee cup -- I happened to be drinking a Starbucks Venti Green Tea at the time. This, of course, started a conversation.

We proceeded to spend the whole two-and-a-half hour flight talking. I quickly realized that he was quite intoxicated, which made it all the more fun for me. And it got better when he found out that the onboard beverage service was cash only.

I think the highlight for him was when we started going through the Sky Mall catalog, only to find that almost every page of his copy had been defaced with hand drawn pictures of male genitalia. He thought it was hysterically funny, so I told him to rent Superbad.

The flight seemed to go by very quickly. Clearly I need to allow myself to be entertained by random strangers more often.


adolfo said...

Flight entertainment simply relax for a while with our captivating and extensive repertoire of in- flight entertainment.
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Blondefabulous said...

That kind of in flight entertainment is free! ;-)

Sara said...

Nice guy... I don't think I would give up my three inches of leg room for anyone. I think that might make me a bad person.

Colleen Snell said...

That's hilarious - but I"m with Sara - my legs are already too crowded! And, I either pretend to be asleep or read like a crazy person so I can avoid those in-flight conversations. I'm a terrible person.

Sara said...

Colleen, you are NOT a terrible person. You are a wise woman with a liking for personal space. No judgment here.

SS+1 said...

Going on what blondefabulous said...Free AND Priceless! Great story!!

dara said...

Blondefabulous: Exactly. Although, on this crappy flight, they don't even give me the option of a movie for $3.

Sara: The bag was really small -- and squishy. My problem was that there's less storage space for the aisle seat, and I had my laptop with me. Oh, and did I mention how some assholes put their giant bags and tennis rackets in the overhead above my seat in such a way that my tiny little blue bag wouldn't even squish in?

Colleen: If he weren't drunk, I'd have been reading, listening to my mp3 player, or sleeping. The only reason I let him talk to me was the drunkenness. So I guess I'm equally terrible, or we're not terrible at all.

SS+1: Thanks. It was an amusing experience. I wonder if I'd be more fun if I got drunk before getting on airplanes.