Alas, I don't have any of the good stories from my early, early years. My nana and my mom have some stories that I wrote back before a lot of kids my age were reading. Apparently one is very funny, because I spelled the word "pop" with an extra "o." Maybe one day I'll get a hold of them and share.
In any event, the only real early writing that I have is My Book About Me. For those that are unfamiliar with this, it is a Dr. Seuss book written as a sort-of questionairre for kids to fill out about them, where they live, and their likes and dislikes.
I got the book for a 5th birthday present from someone named Adam. I don't remember him at all. Whne I got the book, my mother wanted to hold off on filling it out in order to do it right -- to turn it in to a project -- but even then, I generally didn't listen to her. So, when she wasn't paying attention, I filled it out quickly, primarily in crayon, and made up most of the answers as I went along, because I didn't want to take the time to find out the real answers.
For example, I responded to the "How tall am I? " question by responding "I am 301 feet, 401 inches tall." I also wrote that "I think I have about 6 freckles," and "My house has yes steps." I think I was supposed to count the steps.
When asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I responded "T.V. Star," although, if you look at it quickly, it bears a striking resemblance to the word "toaster."
I actually wrote that my favorite pet was a cat-fish. I think I was being indecisive, but I really don't remember. And, it's not like we had any real pets until much, much later.
In the story part, I couldn't be bothered to write a real story, so I just wrote mean things about someone named Jane. I don't remember her, but the best part of the story is "No, Jane I hat you. Dont com to my hous." I also drew a picture of a chicken, and named it after my then 3-year-old sister.
Nice kid, right?
4 comments:
Ha, very cut, as you might have spelled back in the day.
The "e" at the end of words is a hard concept for a 5-year-old to grasp. But at least I was consistent.
haha--Pop spelled w/an extra 'O' is funny. You should definitely get that story. My older sister likes to tell the Ryane story of when I was about 6 or so, I asked my dad one day if he wanted to join the Moose lodge? (We were driving past...). I guess he said no, because apparently, I waited about 1 minute and then said, "But if you joined, you could be the head horny". I sometimes wish I could get away with saying stuff like that to people now...
Popping is clearly not as funny as pooping. And accidental toilet humor is way funnier than intentional toilet humor.
Your moose lodge story is very funny too. Although it caused me to visualize an image of Fred Flinstone and Barney Rubble and whatever fraternal organization they were part of.
I have so many stories like that about when my siblings said something silly. It's the prerogative of being the oldest kid. The best ones usually feature my brother. Maybe I'll tell some soon.
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